I feel old
like creaky leather
an ancient crone
in freezing weather
tomorrow’s Monday
another battle
snow in the forecast
hear my bones a’ rattle
I feel all dried up
earth turned to dust
like a beat-up car
that’s begun to rust
the world has tipped
and warmth is lost
winter bites with hunger
and drools with frost
I was not made for a world of snow and ice. My feet freeze and I need sunshine. If it weren’t for family, I’d live near a beach somewhere. I hope you are all well.
AJM
when i was little
i had someone tell me
“don’t be so eager to grow up”
i’ve had others judge me
like growing up was a competition
that i would fail at
and while i feel old and young
than i ever did before
it doesn’t change
the sadness that overwhelms me
growing up is over with
being an adult
happens now
and i
don’t
want
it
the hardest thing
about growing up
or growing old
is the relationships you grow out of
love may be infinite
but time doesn’t mean
you’ll be in the same place
or the same time
always
eventually
you have to admit
that how you once meant to somebody
is now different
she’s not a baby anymore
she’s on her own path now
you blinked
and missed the old one
but
how you wish
like you could grasp it in your hand
a wish like squiggly worms
you wish
you could zip along, too
Once again (sigh), it’s not Monday. I’ve been toying with the idea of switching to Tuesday and Wednesday posts.
Wrote this one last night. It’s difficult for me to watch my nieces and nephews get older. For some reason, it’s like I always thought they’d be little. Maybe in my eyes they still are. Even though they’re not. 😭
–AJM
on campus
walking through a crowd of people
I still feel like that same nerdy girl
who didn’t know how to talk to ppl
who felt lost on the way to class
who couldn’t just be. normal.
except
I pay my own bills now
I’ve seen the Grand Canyon
and I’ve had sex
does it matter that I’m an adult
and was back then, too
but I still feel seventeen
who actually feels their age?
the president?
hah.
A. J. Morse 